SAMPLE SCENE 1: SCHOOL CORRIDOR
For our first sample scene we wanted to try out filming in school and test out different locations. We started by location scouting different corridors. For this scene we tried using iPhone instead of the DSLR camera as we can get more versatility in shot types. When we found a quiet corridor we tried filming with the x1 lens and x0.5 lens. The x0.5 image was too distorted.
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Our sample script:
What we did well:
SHOT LIST: Locker Scene
1. Marie reading book ELS far away, voyeuristic shot
2. INSERT CU of book
3. MLS of behind, Marie reading
4. Elsa approaching, seen in mirror by audience
5. Elsa slams locker shut, jump scare
6. ELS, voyeuristic shot
7. MLS Elsa and Marie talking
8. MS Elsa talking
9. MS Marie talking
10. MCU Elsa putting lip-gloss on in mirror
11. MS Marie closing locker
12. LS tracking shot Marie and Elsa
Mise-en-scene:
We created the mise-en-scene of the locker and the missing posters. The inside of the locker is decorated with some pictures of our cast as well as various lipglosses for Mandy to use. The poster on the locker was placed so it could be visible for the majority of our takes. We also added a mirror inside the locker to create a close up using it, and potentially for our jump scare.
For the costumes, we wanted to use as many pieces we thought we wold include in our final cut, such as the fake glasses, heart earrings and heart jumper. Through our composition of the mise-en-scene and costumes, we were able to have a more accurate representation of our intended scene, and see the possible difficulties we could face while filming.
Our script for the sample scene:
AUDIENCE FEEDBACK:
General criticism from the media class:
- Posters need to be aged to create a sense of them being there a long time
- Creating verisimilitude through messier lockers and bags on floor, more posters with scribblings all over them, stuff hanging out the locker.
- Build up to false scare (looking around, diegetic headphone sound interrupted)
- More decorations in locker - reinforce the aesthetic of the 2000s
- Exaggerate the scare - Marie needs to respond more to being scared and Elsa reinforce the scare
- Shorter, faster takes - helps us to mask the actor's lack of acting experience
- Need a close up shot of grab
- Use more shot variety and cutaways
- Heavier makeup for Elsa's character - anchor her as the scream queen character, emphasis on lips and lipstick (male gaze), wearing more makeup, jewellery, play with hair
- The final girl also needs to be anchored more (e.g bigger glasses, baggier clothes)
- Different bracelet - the one we had wasn't visible enough
- Stronger signifiers (e.g. heathers, use of matching costume items)
- Use ambient sound
- No slo-mo at the end - it creates a vibe of a rom com rather than horror
The main issue we encountered was due to the cold temperatures and hail. Although we had brought jackets for the cast they were not warm enough while shooting, which caused a lot of delays. If reshooting, or for our burial scene, we would plan on wearing warmer layers.
The Edit:
AUDIENCE FEEDBACK:
- Sense of stalking wasn't created
- Phone pings timings don’t sync up
- Shots of ground is unnecessary, can cut scene shorter
- We can clearly see her shaking, mask the elements of coldness
- The false scare
- Connotations of drinking, smoking, and sex as "sinful"
- Zoom in on the phone to show the text better
- Bottle isn't seen well
- Unnecessary unscrewing shot, and re-screwing is too long
- Can see the cigarette is broken, cut to hide that
- Zoom in or zoom out when jumping between shots to flow better
- Close up reaction to vodka can be taken out
- Remove camera shake during scare
- Dialogue seems ingenuine ("slash my throat")
- Bad dialogue audio, rerecord
For the rest of the mise-en-scene, the posters were scribbled on and we printed them on yellow paper so that they'd look older.
We decorated Mandy's locker similarly to before, adding some posters of films that inspired us such as Carrie (1976), and Jawbreaker (1999) to add intertextuality
. The note at the bottom asks Mandy to go to prom, showing her as the popular scream queen. We decided to change the locker to Mandy's instead of Laurie's, as we felt it wouldn't've fit Laurie's personality to have her locker decorated like this.For the costume, we felt as if the idea of a clique wasn't visually anchored enough. We decided to place Mandy as the leader of the group, followed by Marion and Laurie. We based this on the example of Heathers (1988), and Mean Girls (2004).
Because of this, we made changes to their costumes. Rather than have Laurie appear drastically different than the other two we made her wear the same skirt as Marion, but styled differently. We based these decisions off of Veronica in Heathers (1988). Here, Laurie wears Doc Martens and black fishnets to represent her rebellious attitude. Her jumper shows her as more conservative than the other two, and reflects her studiousness, along with her tied up hair and lack of makeup.
For Mandy, we gave her a pink checkered skirt with a different design, to show her belonging to the group but reflect her superiority compared to the rest. She is wearing a tank top and no tights, and her showing more skin shows her promiscuity compared to Laurie. She wears heavy eye makeup and frequently reapplies her lipgloss. This and her high heels were chosen to make her cater to Mulvey's male gaze.
The Edit:
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